I’m sure you’ve seen the billboards and late night TV commercials for the New Psychic Network. Chainsaw launched a new enterprise this year because of all the unpredictable things happening to everyone.
Now, you can give Chainsaw a visit to put those important matters to rest. You can walk away confidently knowing you have all the answers ahead of others. You can now predict how things will take shape.
Chainsaw got his start by giving predictive advice to many politicians in Washington DC. With Chainsaw’s predictions and steering, dozens of Representatives from the House and a few from the Senate were able to take their standard low salaries mandated by the Constitution and parley it into Millions of dollars.
Now you too can get in on the act or more specifically, in front of the act, to multiply your meager income into the kind of funds you need to purchase multiple mansions on very prime properties whose taxes combined are greater than their standard salary.
Now there’s a bunch of questions about inflation, empty shelves, freighter ships languishing in the harbors waiting to unload, when will things change?
Want to know the answers to these questions? Schedule an appointment with the New Psychic Network and Chainsaw will give you the answers for a mere $2500 reading.
Don’t worry, New Jersey. Chainsaw Chicken is here. I’ll find out what these mysterious drones are up to.
I needed to get to my little secret. When I arrived at the plane hangers of our terminal at Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd. I went in the back and drug out the last flying example of the famous Hiller VZ-1 Pawnee flying platform.
I ‘found’ it back of the storage hanger in 1964 when Fairchild Aircraft bought out Heller. We purchased this hanger at an auction once the acquisitions was completed. We wanted the hanger in order to store our future projects.
I filled up the reserve with Hydrogen Peroxide that I robbed from Mrs. Chicken’s hair products. The second tank I attached to an old chemical fire extinguisher. Then I lit the match.
I ascended to about 600 feet and started cruising around. I bet it wasn’t 15 mins when I spotted the whole fleet. They were circling the 10th hole at Trump’s Betminster Golf Club.
I leaned my flying platform over and headed for the ...
We had a Christmas party this year at Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd. Everyone had a great time. We had a White Elephant gift exchange. Every time someone exchanged a gift, we all had to take a drink. Soon, the room reeked of Egg Nog and Spiced Rum mixed with some Mountain Dew.
I have to agree, that I was into my cheer a little too much.
As my Porcelain addiction began to become obvious with my head deep into the bowl, I started thinking of all the names there are for what I was spewing into the toilet.
Sure, there’s vomiting.. and spewing as I said before…
Then there’s barfing, puking, regurgitating… Let me grab another slice of anchovy pizza as I think of more.
Ralphing, upchucking, spit up… damn that pizza goes down easy, I’ll grab another slice.
Mmmmmm… Let’s see, there’s blowing, hurling and heaving, and tossing one’s cookies and expelling.
Oh wow, one slice left… there’s retching and gagging too…
Oh boy, that last piece must of had a bad ...
After almost a year since its launch, I have been asking ChapGPT “Who is Chainsaw Chicken?”
It would answer with garbage about no information is available on anyone with that name, blah, blah, blah.
Suddenly, when I routinely asked it again, I was surprised to see this response.
“Yes, the content on Adventures of Chainsaw Chicken can be described as absurd due to its surreal humor and playful narrative style. The stories often combine unexpected elements and whimsical characters, creating a unique blend of comedy and satire. This approach invites readers to think critically about everyday concepts through a humorous lens.”
I guess I am honored. But ‘absurd’???
